Well, I have to be honest. I stopped posting for a while because....well....I didn't feel very thankful. There, I said it. It was so hard to go to Facebook and read everyone's "thankful posts". I just wasn't feeling it. I thought to myself, "here I am the week before Thanksgiving with my step daughter visiting, hardly any money because we had to pay so much to fly her here, and my husband and I have been fighting over everything." Yes, I was having a major pity party and being totally selfish. If I could only find the words to share with you on how wrong I was to feel so ungrateful! God has done some AMAZING things in my life and our family that I shouldn't let a day go by without thanking him for the life I have. You see, there was a time a few years back when I made a choice that almost made me lose my ability to raise my own children. It was a time when I didn't know if my new husband (very new) was going to stay married to me. Everything was up for grabs. Thank you Jesus for pulling me out of the pits last week and waking me from my ungratefulness! I went to church on Sunday feeling desperate to hear from God and grasp onto to anything and did he ever give me something to go on! Sometimes I think God is so funny how he works. I actually didn't even decide to go to church until the very last minute. My husband had plans to go to a football game and wasn't going to be able to go to church and make the game on time, so I thought I might as well stay home with him, but like I said I went. The whole way there I was speeding because I had left so late and I didn't want to miss more worship songs than I had to...that's my favorite part of course. When I got there I only got about a song and a half and then it was time to sit. I was pouting on the inside. Then the youth pastor gets up to preach (I had forgotten the pastor would be out of town for his daughter's wedding.) I pouted some more. Some more brutal honesty here...I thought there was no way God was going to teach me anything using the youth pastor's sermon....I mean, come on - his sermons are geared towards kids, right? :) Yeah, right. He had the most amazing sermon and at one point he made a side note about the lies that can get in our heads and directly affect how we treat the people around us and how we feel. We know where those lies come from...NOT from God. Then he said this..."You know, the lies that say, "I can't believe you're still dealing with that", "You are the worst person ever", "You'll never be like her/him/them, etc". This may mean nothing to you as a reader of this post/blog, but this hit me like a complete ton of bricks. This was and is me A LOT of the time! But, like he said, these are lies! How dare I let those lies cover up the joy and happiness that Jesus has brought into my life. Those lies are sent to destroy the contentment I should be feeling on a daily basis because my life has been restored! Thank you God for using the youth pastor to reveal this truth to me! Needless to say, I feel more content and thankful this week than I have in a long, long, time. God has totally changed my life and I would be happy to share about it in depth if you are curious about the details. If not, I will continue to post more regularly about my life, my kids, my crafts, etc. Be thankful every day!
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